GOD'S CREATION

For Your Laughter............

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM ' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.


WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'

'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws


WOMEN'S REVENGE

'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, ' but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

W O R D S

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

CREATION

A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.'

The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'
The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........'HEBREWS'

God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

CIRCLE OF FRIENDS

HANDY LITTLE CHART - GOD HAS A POSITIVE ANSWER:
You say: 'It's impossible' God says: All things are possible (Luke 18:27)
You say: 'I'm too tired' God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: 'Nobody really loves me' God says: I love you (John 3:1 6 & John 3:34 )
You say: 'I can't go on' God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: 'I can't figure things out' God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5- 6)
You say: 'I can't do it' God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)
You say: 'I'm not able' God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: 'It's not worth it' God says: It will be worth it (Roman 8:28 )
You say: 'I can't forgive myself' God says: I Forgive you (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: 'I can't manage' God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)
You say: 'I'm afraid' God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)
You say: 'I'm always worried and frustrated' God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)
You say: 'I'm not smart enough' God says: I give you wisdom (I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: 'I feel all alone' God says: I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)

HAPPY MOMENTS - PRAISE GOD
DIFFICULT MOMENTS - SEEK GOD
QUIET MOMENTS - WORSHIP GOD
PAINFUL MOMENTS - TRUST GOD
EVERY MOMENTS - THANK GOD

Celebrating Iris Birthday.......

Last saturday i.e. 18th April 2009 we celebrate Iris 25th birthday at Kirishima in Cititel Hotel. Japanese food is her favourite as well as her dad's. So we choose Kirishima cos the food there are fresh and good. It's just the 3 of us.
On the 18th night her friends threw a dinner party for her at an Italian restaurant in Pulau Tikus.
Tonight we are going to celebrate with family n friends at Red Cafe in Krystal Point.

CHRISTIANS - BEWARE OF THE DANGERS OF YOGA

Dear Brothers and Sisters
Just want to share with you this testimony of an Ex-Yoga Teacher,
which confirms that Yoga really glorifies "that
ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray" (Rev 12:9).
For this reason, the Christian should not allow his body (the temple of
the Holy Spirit) to be engaged in any "pose"that expresses worship to Satan.

Recently i received an email about Yoga from my friend. Pl read the
testimony below so you will know why Christianshould not learn Yoga.

Mdm Choy PohShon is the member of Wesley Methodist Church, She wrote a
book "Confessions of an Ex-Yoga teacher", attached is the book review.

Blessings,

HI friends,

On Wednesday, I attended a talk by an ex-yoga teacher, Mdm PohShon
Choy, who sold her yoga centre (earning lots of money giving yoga
lessons) and severed all ties with yoga. She urges us to inform
relatives, friends, Family members, etc., NOT to get involved at all.

For those who had taken ! up yoga lessons (hot yoga, power yoga,
pe-la-tei, so on), repe nt and ask God for forgiveness.

Many claimed that they only join to keep fit, only doing the exercise
poses and not meditation.

Christians think it is ok so long they don't participate in the
Meditation part. Mdm Choy explains that the central of Yoga
(originated from Hinduism) is the spirit of Kundalini spirit Of snake or cobra).

Yoga poses are actually animal poses (e.g. camel, rabbit,). All these
look very normal and harmless, stretching and exercising.
But the danger is, once a person does such poses, the spirit of
Kundalini (the snake is in a coiled position) is stimulated or aroused.

As the persons goes from basic to intermediate to advance stage of
yoga lessons (still not meditation yet), the coiled "snake" will be
aroused further. It will rise and rise further.

There are 7 centres in the human body - ! Starting from the navel.

The final centre is the part between the eye brow( known to many as
the third eye). When the spirit is aroused to the final centre, the
third eye will be opened.

This is called the full enlightenment.

The first thing the person sees is demons. For some, they will become
insane seeing such horrifying demons.
For others, they are not afraid and will have the power to fore-tell
other people's health, problems, luck, etc (like a fortune teller).
In fact, they manipulate and control other people.
The meditation part will come in very subtle.

Mdm Choy said she was approached by a couple who found her contact
from the yellow pages and told her they wanted To teach her new things about yoga.
She was very keen and sat under their teaching. She learnt how to
meditate and it mus! t be done in odd hours of the day (past midnight).
So she trie d.. She actually felt a wriggling feeling in her stomach!
She also mentioned that her third eye was opened. She could see her
own aura (electric fields in all human beings).

Her turning point came when God caused her spiritual
eyes to open - she witnessed a lady being delivered, wriggling like a snake on the
floor. Mdm Choy thanked God for being gracious to her;
she took 1-2weeks to be delivered. She knows of a lady who took 3 months to be cleansed!!

It is a sad thing; there is even yoga lessons for children.
In the States, a Methodist started the Christian yoga..
However, there are some believers who still continue, saying that they find no harm
after doing yoga for 3 years.

Mdm Choy says it is our soul that is in danger. The evil one will try
all ways to ensnare/trap Christians.
Someone in the class raised a questio! n - if we have The Holy Spirit,
how can the spirit of kundalini be aroused?
Mdm Choy replied our God is a holy
God, the Holy Spirit will be grieved and will depart. God cannot be mocked.
God's spirit left King Saul when he disobeyed God.
To God, rebellion spirit is witchcraft.
We are not against yoga teachers, yoga students but we are fighting
against powers, principalities in the Spiritual realm.
Let's be on guard, be aware!

FIVE FINGER PRAYER

This is so neat. I had never heard this before. This is beautiful - and it is surelyworth making the 5 finger prayer a part of our lives.


1. Your thumb is nearest you. So begin your prayers by praying for those closest to you. They are the easiest to remember. To pray for our loved ones is, as C. S. Lewis once said, a "sweet duty."

2. The next finger is the pointing finger. Pray for those who teach, instruct and heal. This! includ es teachers, doctors, and ministers. They need support and wisdom in pointing others in the right direction. Keep them in your prayers.

3. The next finger is the tallest finger. It reminds us of our leaders. Pray for the president, leaders in business and industry, and administrators. These people shape our nation and guide public opinion. They need God's guidance.

4. The fourth finger is our ring finger. Surprising to many is the fact that this is our weakest finger, as any piano teacher will testify. It should remind us to pray for those who are weak, in trouble or in pain. They need your prayers day and night. You cannot pray too much for them.

5. And lastly comes our little finger - the smallest finger of all which is where we should place ourselves in relation to God and others. As the Bible says, "The least shall be the greatest among you." Your! pinkie should remind you to pray for yourself. By the time you have prayed for the other four groups, your own needs will be put into proper perspective and you will be able to pray for yourself more effectively.

THE SECRET

The Secret
One day, one friend asked another,
"How is it that you are always so happy?
You have so much energy,
and you never seem to get down."


With her eyes smiling, she said,
"I know the Secret!"
"What secret is that?"
To which she replied,
"I'll tell you all about it,
but you have to promise to
share the Secret with others."


"The Secret is this:
I have learned there is little I can do
in my life that will make me truly happy.
I must depend on God to make
me happy and to meet my needs.
When a need arises in my life,
I have to trust God to supply
according to HIS riches.
I have learned most of the time
I don't need half of what I think I do.
He has never let me down.
Since I learned that 'Secret', I am happy."


The questioner's first thought was,
"That's too simple!"
But upon reflecting over her own life
she recalled how she thought a bigger house
would make her happy, but it didn't!
She thought a better paying job
would make her happy, but it hadn't.
When did she realize her greatest happiness?
Sitting on the floor with her grandchildren,
playing games, eating pizza or reading a story,
a simple gift from God.


Now you know it too!
We can't depend on people to make us happy.
Only GOD in His infinite wisdom can do that.
Trust HIM!
And now I pass the Secret on to you!
So once you get it, what will you do?


YOU have to tell someone the Secret, too!
That GOD in His wisdom will take care of YOU!
But it's not really a secret...
We just have to believe it and do it...
Really trust God!

Easter Sunday

Attended this morning Easter service
Sermon message: The Transforming Spirit
Speaker: Bishop Hwa Yung

Why do Christian celebrate Easter Sunday?

Christians celebrate Easter Sunday because Jesus rose from death. The resurrection of Jesus Christ is one of the fundamental principles and beliefs of Christianity and a well documented historical fact. Christians celebrate Easter Sunday because they believe, Jesus died for their sin on the Cross on Good Friday. Jesus was buried on Friday and rose from death on Sunday. Christians believe only Jesus can give eternal life, because He overcame death.

John 3: 16
For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.

Good Friday

Attended Good Friday service last night.
Sermon by Bishop Hwa Yung
Sermon title: The Waiting Father.
Luke 15:11-31 - Parable of the Lost son


What is Good Friday?

On Good Friday, Christians remember the day when Jesus was crucified on a cross.

When is Good Friday?

Good Friday is the Friday before Easter Sunday (Easter Day).

Why is it called Good Friday?

The name may be derived from 'God's Friday' in the same way that good-bye is derived from 'God be with ye'.

It is 'good' because the barrier of sin was broken.

What happened on Good Friday?

Jesus was arrested and was tried, in a mock trial. He was handed over to the Roman soldiers to be beaten and flogged with whips. A crown of long, sharp thorns was thrust upon his head.

Jesus was forced to carry his own cross outside the city to Skull Hill. He was so weak after the beating that a man named Simon, who was from Cyrene, was pulled from the crowd and forced to carry Jesus' cross the rest of the way.

Jesus was nailed to the cross. Two other criminals were crucified with him, their crosses were on either side of him. A sign above Jesus read "The King of the Jews."


According to the bible:

The third hour of the day - Jesus was nailed to the cross.
(9:00 am )

The Sixth Hour of the day - darkness covered the land
(12:00 noon)

The ninth hour of the day - the darkness left, and the Lord died
( 3:00 pm).

The hours in the bible are calculated from the first hour of the day, being 6 in the morning.

Christians believe that Jesus stood in our place.
His death paid the penalty not for his own wrong doings but for ours.

Maundy Thursday

Attended Maunday thursday service last night.
Paster Hwa Jen sermon was on "Love one another".
'And now I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.' John 15:12
Jesus died to save us and free us from sin.
Most of the congregration is from the 1st service.

What is Maundy thursday?

Maundy Thursday - also called Holy Thursday is the feast or holy day on the Thursday before Easter that commemorates the Last Supper of Jesus Christ with the Apostles.
The Last SupperOn this day, Christians remember the Last Supper. During the meal Jesus took bread and wine and shared them with his disciples. Christians continue to share bread and wine as part of their worship in church.
The Last Supper was probably a Passover meal – the meal which Jewish people share together to celebrate the time when God delivered Moses and the people from slavery in Egypt.
The night of Maundy Thursday is the night on which Jesus was betrayed by Judas in the Garden of Gethsemane.

Tonight, will be attending the Easter Friday service in church.